At lunch the other day a colleague of mine, was mentioning that she was fearful the other night when she came into her apartment building foyer and found a homeless man sleeping there. Under normal circumstances this young rising professional, is a caring and compassionate lady, who often works with an indigent client population - yet this time she said she felt particularly vulnerable even though the man was doing nothing but sleeping in the hallway. While she felt some guilt on behalf of her own concerns I reminded her that she shouldn't be ashamed for being fearful. After all the human emotion of fear is a gift - according to Gavin de Becker. Why she felt fearful was because the incident was outside of her frame of reference. This incident was isolated from her normal day to day activities - as it has never happened before or at 1100 pm in the evening. This is something not normal for Akronites. However if she lived in the Bronx (NYC) where my cousin is from, it would be a normal day.
The reason some people are fearful of one thing, while others are not is based on Capt. John Boyd's theory on the OODA Loop. A mental process that every human being goes through on a regular basis. OODA stands for the process of Observing, then Orienting, then Deciding and the Acting. The picture below provides a visual representation of this split second decision making model.
The bubble with 'previous experiences' could be what we call the Frame of Reference. Things that fall outside of our references tend to create emotions especially fear. Fear in turn then drives the survival stress reaction. This is why when I provide lectures on Personal Safety or Violence Mitigation in the workplace i remind people that its OK for them to be afraid and to have perceptual distortions and physical distress when they are exposed to violence. Because, for most people, violence is outside of their frame of reference. They are otherwise, not socialized to the real impact of violence (despite what Hollywood portrays). I say most people, because outside of the military, some police and other civilians regularly train to diminish the effects of the survival stress reaction.
In any ways, how can we use the understanding of the Frame of Reference to protect ourselves? What's the Fourth Rule of Fight Like A Girl? Attract Attention. If we can get into the bad guy's OODA Loop we maybe able to short circuit his plan. Coach Tony Blauer, advocates trying to always find the disconnect in a situation. See the youtube video here for a real life example of using the disconnect (warning: profanity). In the video you'll see Tony Blauer getting into his enemy's OODA loop by playing on his 3 principles.
Hope this helps, Stay Safe!
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BTW, here is a picture of my wife hosting our table at the Akron Childrens' Hospital Wellness Fair.
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