Fight Like A Girl! - Akron

Sextortion: Are you positive that your daughter is not sexting?

2012-01-25T19:07:00.000-05:00

I usually don't repost other people's blogs; but i though this was too important not to pass along. It comes from JJ Luna's most excellent blog: http://blog.invisible-privacy.com

Monday, October 17, 2011

ARE YOU POSITIVE THAT YOUR DAUGHTER’S NOT SEXTING?

That’s what the parents of three teenage girls in Indianapolis, Indiana thought. Nevertheless, at a party with a webcam, they visited an Internet chat room. One thing let to another, and the boys at the other end dared them to flash their breasts. They did, but no problem, right? The boys were in some other state, far away, and they’d never hear from them again.

A week passed. Then one of the girls received a series of threats by e-mail. She was told to either email more explicit pictures and videos of herself , “or I’ll post your pictures to all your MySpace friends.”

Did the girl then confess to her parents what she had done? No, she complied with his demand at least twice. (Police and federal authorities eventually became involved and indicted a 19-year-old Maryland man for the crime of "sextortion.”)

SEXTORTION IS INCREASING

Teens are more vulnerable to blackmail because they're easy to intimidate and embarrassed to tell their parents. The result is that they will do almost anything to keep naked pictures of themselves from getting out.

Alabama.
   Jonathan, 24, extorted nude photos from more than 50 young women who were on Facebook or MySpace.

Wisconsin.
   Anthony, 18, posed as a girl on Facebook to trick male high school classmates into sending him nude cell phone photos, which he then used to extort them for sex.

California.
   A 31-year-old man hacked into more than 200 computers and threatened to expose nude photos he found unless their owners (many of them juveniles) posed for more sexually explicit videos.

Here is a suggestion to any of you parents with a teen daughter. Have a dead serious talk with her about the danger of sexting. Explain that if, despite your warnings, she takes some revealing pictures of herself and sends them to anyone on Planet Earth, she may soon get a threat to take and send more pictures, or else. Kindly explain to her that she will at this point have two options:

Plan A. She can confess to you and ask for your help. There will be some consequences such as grounding involved, but this will pass and you love her and will help her.

Plan B. She can submit to the threats and send the blackmailer whatever he asks for. Explain that this will eventually come to light anyway and at that point, life as she’s known it will disappear.

Labels: nude pictures, sexting, sextortion, teen blackmail

NYPD Advises Women Not to Wear Skirts....

2011-10-01T14:54:00.000-04:00

New York City realizing that there sexual assault problem has gone through the roof has gone and done the unfathomable. Tell women not to wear shorts, skirts, or dresses. Whats next chastity belts?

"He pointed at my outfit and said, 'Don't you think your shorts are a little short?'" she told the Journal. "He pointed at their dresses and said they were showing a lot of skin."
The officer also told them that "you're exactly the kind of girl this guy is targeting," according to Lauren. NYPD spokesman Paul Browne said the officers "are simply pointing out that as part of the pattern involving one or more men that the assailant(s) have targeted women wearing skirts."

(source: http://www.nbcnewyork.com/news/local/Brooklyn-Sex-Attacks-Skirts-Women-NYPD-130863828.html).

While there is a correlation with the police understanding that the predators are attacking women who wear certain clothing the problem is that they're falling into a trap of believing that the victim somehow precipitated the crime, or asked for the crime to happen. Which is in fact totally incorrect and inappropriate - the police in turn should be seeking to inform the citizenry of the problem, provide or advocate deterrents to the population (gasp "legalize concealed weapons permits"), and increase patrols within the area to be proactive against the crime of rape.

Information Security

2011-06-16T22:22:00.000-04:00

What you say-what you do- gives clues and hints to potential assailants; don't leave unnecessary information available to rapists and attackers. Or identity thieves.

Ever hear a so called expert on self-protection say things like "if they grab your purse, give it to them, its replaceable"? Well if you give them your purse guess what they now have? Pictures of you, your address, emergency contact numbers, pictures of your kids or other loved ones, maybe where you work, where you hang out, what gym you go to, and on and on. Do you really want them to know all of this about you? What happens if that mugger becomes a stalker?

Think about it... all your vital documents are in your purse, its essentially your lifeline. Maybe the purse snatcher is trying to develop a better understanding of who you are because they are 'love at first sight' potential stalker. An exercise that you and a lady friend can do together is to trade purses and see how much information they can figure out on each other. From here now begin to trim down that which is extraneous and not necessary or prepare to fight for your purse and wallet because it is your informational lifeline. In the military this is known as PERSEC Personal Security and its important that you practice it.

Awhile back I bought a jogging stroller on an internet auction site. It wasn't available for delivery so I had to go and pick it up. The woman who owned it said I could pick it up any time and "that she keeps late hours and lives alone" (mentally I was shouting don't reveal this kind of information to a stranger!). This is clearly a violation of PERSEC.

Also, think about what you throw out in the trash, could someone who went through your trash develop a considerable dossier on you (what kind of mail you get, credit card statements, magazines you read, places you shop, etc.). Anything with my name, bank account, personal information, or financial info either gets shredded or burned. Other things to keep in mind are your cellphone; if this gets stolen and it has relationship references in their then someone can easily use the information to find you. For instance your cellphone says Mom & Dad on the number. They now have the number and if its a land line its not hard to do a reverse phone number look up and get the vital info on your folks. Now they could call them up and pretend to be a long lost friend looking to get back in touch with you. Yikes! What about the GPS in your car; is it programmed to take you to your home? Same thing; this violates PERSEC! Program home to be the local police station or some other innocuous location that you know how to get to your home.

The topic of PERSEC is huge in the way of FORCE PROTECTION; or how we protect our loved ones. Though in the simplest forms its basically keeping pertinent details of your life, location, and circumstances away from people who don't need to know.

In all regards... Stay Safe!

Summer 2011 Hiatus

2011-06-13T01:11:00.001-04:00

I haven't posted in awhile. Things on our end have been fairly busy with the birth of our son, Hunter Olen we've been fairly busy, and unfortunately I have been remiss to write. Plus several other side projects. New articles are forthcoming and in the works. We will be hosting classes (Fight Like A Girl I & II, Child Awareness Rapid Escape) in the Fall both at Akron and Canton venues.

Spring Update

2011-03-27T12:45:00.000-04:00

Spring is here (at least thats what I keep telling myself). :-)

I'm sorry I haven't updated my blog in such a long time. I have been particular busy on the guy side of things (which is Life Force Protection, LLC). We are taking a lot of the material that we have developed and putting it into a template for non-profit work. With the hopes of pushing it out for everyone's benefit.

With that said, here's whats new with Fight Like A Girl - Akron:

We have had considerable interest in the Child Awareness Rapid Escape course. We ran a community event at Akron Children's in February and we had a phenomenal turnout of 68 children - yikes! I was sore after that class. Because of the demand for this course we are changing our fee structure to be more inclusive: CARE Classes will be valued at $150 for up to 30 children. This makes for a great way to offer this material to scout troops, church groups, social clubs, and large families!
We have combined the techniques from DAW (Defense Against Weapons) and GOG (Girls on Guard) to bring you a much more developed format that is congruent with the realities of street self defense (gross motor based, easy to remember, and use).
Lastly, I've gotten feedback from people who have been to my classes and have told me that what I said about freezing when you are attacked is true. How can you offset this? remember to start talking to your attacker, get your hands up (even if you are down); talking and motion engage your brain to snap out of the Survival Stress Reaction and then commit to a course of action and do not stop! I know this because it has happened to me as well. Practice, builds muscle memory. Come to more of our classes, teach your friends; get a training partner.

Our next class is listed below.

Stay Safe!

Righteous Violence (Bullying)

2010-11-26T11:29:00.002-05:00

There's been a lot of discussion in the media in the past few months on the topic of bullies and bullying. Stories abound of teens who commit suicide because of bullying. It seems that the topic of bullying whether through physical abuse, verbal abuse, or through electronic media (texting, email, facebook) its as if the American psyche is wondering "how did we go so wrong? why are our children doing this to each other?". The fact that teens/ children (and adults) are often very cruel to each other should not come as a shock to parents. Look around you'll see that depravity unfortunately seems to be a human condition that we sometimes just can't shake out of our gene pool. Whether you approach the topic from an ecclesiastical point of view or a humanist point of view it doesn't matter that the fact that this has been going on for a very long time is evident.

I don't claim to be an expert on childhood bullying. But having been bullied through much of adolescence and having former bullies apologize to me later in life - i think have a unique first person perspective on the issue. I can say that often we teach our children the absolute wrong things to do and that carries repercussions into life that are much more far reaching and devastating. On of those damaging piece of advice that I received was "fighting doesn't solve anything" or "just walk away".

I beg to differ.

In my last post on How To Survive a Massacre, Pt. 2 I mentioned noted author and psychologist on human aggression, Lt. Col Dave Grossman who during his speaking topic on "The Bulletproof Mind" he said that at the Virginia Tech Massacre, several students were found sitting in their seats dead from a single bullet wound to their head. That means that they sat and waited knowing the killer was executing people 1 by 1.

Why weren't they trying to fight back or at least hide? Grossman says we are teaching our children the absolute wrong things to do. "Don't fight on the playground Johnny" is what they have heard day in and day out. But are we seriously going to tell our teenage sons and daughters (and adult children) "don't fight back against murders and rapists!" NO OF COURSE NOT. But then why are we are teaching a double message?

According to Grossman, and I agree wholeheartedly; we must be teaching our children that the judicious use of righteous violence is not only acceptable but it is honored within society. So how do we teach judicious use of violence. I like Ron Lauinger's 3 Rules for dealing with bullies:

Tell the bully to stop, if he/she doesn't stop then
Tell the teacher, if the teacher doesn't stop it then;
Fight back

While, I can't be certain that fighting back always works its often the response that the bully wasn't planning for. Life changed for me when a bully in high school knocked my lunch tray out of my hands and on to the floor. Instead of just trying to salvage the moment and going on with life, I reacted, I punched him square in the face. The lunchroom teacher grabbed my arm and jerked me around asking "why I did that?" My reply was "he knocked my lunch out of my hands what am I supposed to eat now?". Its interesting that I didn't get a detention or an expulsion.

The other interesting part about that was I wasn't bullied again. Righteous justice.

Will that work in the school system nowadays? I don't know. With all the zero-tolerance behavior support modification (BTW how is that working?) its tough for a child to even remotely respond. And then issues of cyber-bullying which often don't include physical assault require a different tact.

But ask yourself what is the more important life lesson to teach your child? don't fight back, be a victim the rest of your life? Or if you do fight back and it is judicious we will stand up with you and go to bat for you? I have chosen the latter with my children.

Its a rough world out there.

Stay Safe!

How to Survive a Massacre Part 2

2010-11-15T19:32:00.000-05:00

http://www.roseminars.com/roci10inco.htmlHow to Survive a Massacre Part 2

In part 1 we discussed the difference between cover, concealment, distance, and using 'dead space' to hide us from the killer or his/ her line of sight/ weapons fire. We could consider this as Getting Out and Hiding Out.

Now lets talk about what to do if we can't find cover, concealment, or dead space. You might think of this as Lock Out, Call Out, and Fight Out. If your thinking to yourself "hey there's a lot of 'outs' here" well your definitely ahead of the game. What we are doing is what is called the Out Drill. I can't really take credit for it. The guy who developed this is Lt. Col. Dave Grossman, PhD who is bar none one of the experts on violence in society.

Lock Out: Its pretty simple since you can't get out. You put enough barricade between you and the Killer. If that means that you can lock doors great! Sometimes though doors don't lock so you have to be creative. That means you move things in front of the door to make a barricade. If its in a school you use desks, chairs, blackboards. Everything and anything you can find to barricade the entrance. I also heard about a scenario where someone let loose lions, rhinos, and tigers in a zoo and people were being mauled. Guess what some of the survivors did? thats right they piled into the restrooms (since they were made of block) and barricaded the doors with everything they could find. Which meant taking the doors off the stalls and wedging them between the door handle and the floor. In these situations you use whatever you can to save your life. Now is not the time to be concerned with property damage. Something else that works really well is a door stop. Rubber and wooden wedges used to hold doors open can also be used to hold doors shut.

Call Out: In Fight Like A Girl you'll hear us say things like "you have to stop the killing". The best way to do that is to get help. Never assume that someone else is calling for help. When people are taught CPR they are specifically instructed to point to someone and say "you go call 911 and report back when you have done so". In a high stress situation people do not always think straight or function well. Therefore you may have to become direct, even verbally aggressive with someone to get help "YOU CALL 911 ON YOUR CELL PHONE " (yes I am shouting) "TELL THEM THAT YOU ARE AT___________AND SOME GUY IS SHOOTING PEOPLE WITH A (rifle or pistol, if you don't know just say rifle)". Why rifle vs. pistol? Because someone with a rifle is a much greater threat than a pistol and it will bring a lot more firepower to bear on the S.O.B. So what happens if you can't call, maybe you don't have a cellphone or can't get to it? How about one of these things:

No it won't bring the SWAT Team, but it will bring the Combat Engineers. Several angry guys with axes, fire hoses and ladders. They can make openings in walls and get people out. They can fight the shooter with high pressure water cannons, and they can put guys with guns onto the roof or into second story windows. And where there is fire there will also likely be police cars. That is people with guns who will find and kill the killer.

So now that we are talking about killing the killer, our last way to survive a massacre is to do the unexpected and that is Fight Back or Fight it Out. For whatever reason you are in a situation where you cannot Hide Out, Get out, Lock Out, Call Out and imminent death is upon you. You must fight it out. There are countless stories where 2 or 3 people have tackled a killer and subdued him. But how do you fight? Ideally with a weapon, if your in the office, throw anything that is big or solid (trashcans, staplers, weighted tape dispenser, chairs, 3 hole punch, etc.). Throw these at his head. If you must close with him either try to knock him/her down or use a pen, pencil, letter opener, and anything that you can direct a good amount force with (sharp or blunt doesn't matter - actually blunt objects that impale hurt more) and keep striking the person in the face and eyes. Don't stop! Even if you are shot never stop. Nobody ever died of a broken bone, keep fighting or retreating. Tell yourself, I am not going to die here! I will live to a ripe old age! Mindset is everything.

Your probably thinking. Brian you are crazy. Yes. But that's beside the point.In today's schools they are now teaching students to do this very thing. The training is called ALiCE and it teaches kids these very same principles. But why stop in schools? Even if your workplace isn't forward thinking you should be! Look around, consider your escape routes, where can you go to Lock Out, what can you use for cover or concealment, lastly what can you use to fight it out? Personal safety isn't just a right, its a responsibility. use it.

Stay Safe!

Practice Session

2010-10-22T14:55:00.002-04:00

Ladies,

I'll be holding a practice session on Wednesday Nov. 10 from 6pm-9pm at 215 W. Bowery Street, Akron, OH / Conference Rooms 5 & 6.

View Larger Map

Unlike regular classes, there is no anticipated course plan. I'll be there with the mats and Redman Suit, and some fake weapons for DAW. We can cover anything you want from FLAG, GOG, and DAW.

Cost is $5 for the evening. Come in at any time, leave at any time. This is a great way to brush up on your skills. Please RSVP if you plan to attend so I can have enough gear available.

Thanks and Stay Safe!

What happened to "How to Survive a Massacre Pt.2"? Its a comin! Still in the works.

How to Survive a Massacre

2010-09-16T22:23:00.006-04:00

In the realm of security and law enforcement the term ‘Active Shooter’ is parlance for a person who walks into a building or area with a firearm and starts shooting people. Lt. Col. Dave Grossman, PhD states; “let’s not call them ‘active shooters’, shooters are people who go to gun clubs and shoot for entertainment, let’s call these people what they are; ‘active killers’. I like Col. Grossman phrasing better so that’s what I’ll use for the remainder of this blog entry. Several past incidents include; The Discovery Channel Massacre, the Fort Hood Massacre, the Virginia Tech Massacre, or the Mumbai Massacre (hey, you may be traveling!). Psychologists and criminologists all have several theories and hypotheses for why someone goes on a shooting rampage – but few offer realistic options for people who find themselves in an active killer scenario. Every situation is different and it is impossible to try to say this is the solution for all Active Killer scenarios. While this would stop some consultant from providing advice on what to do we at Fight Like A Girl – Akron feel it’s a good starting point. The information is presented from the standpoint of someone who does not have a weapon and/or is not prepared to return fire/ shoot back (e.g. your children).

First off believe what you are seeing or hearing. In past columns I have written about getting into a person’s decision making process or their OODA Loop (Observe-Orient-Decide- Act). Events around you will be transpiring quickly, you may or may not see the active killer, you may or may not see the victims or the trauma involved (which may include blood), you may see people running, screaming, yelling, you may hear what sounds like ‘firecrackers’ (if you haven’t the experience of being around firearms), you may smell smoke or see bursts of flame. These are all realistic indicators that something is terribly wrong. Believe what you are seeing or hearing! Now let your OODA loop work; Observe what is taking place, Orient (where is the killer, which way is s/he shooting, where is safety), Decide (what am I going to do), and then Act (do what you have decided). If you are afraid, tell yourself ‘fear is normal’ then act!

Secondly, what is safe? Safety usually means to find a place that has what is commonly known as ‘cover’ or ‘concealment’. Cover is what will stop a bullet or fragmentation (bombs, grenades). Cover can most likely be summed up as “is it concrete, steel, or large amounts of dirt?” Concrete planters and vehicle engines are good ‘cover’.

Anything else that hides you from the view of the killer is to be considered ‘concealment’. Also, cover and concealment is to be considered temporary. If the shooter moves around so that you are no longer protected by the cover or concealment then you need to move. Now here’s a nugget of information that you’d have to spend several hundreds of dollars for at those fancy shooting schools; ‘don’t hog cover’. Hogging cover is when you see someone getting up as close as possible to what they call cover. Hogging cover robs you of your field of vision. By backing away from the cover you stay protected but also are able to see around the edges of cover in case the murderer starts to move around to your vantage point.

Concealment on the other hand is what will hide you, but not stop a bullet. Although you must overcome the killer’s weapon you can also overcome his/her mind as well. However, concealment is always the 2^ndchoice: you want cover, but you may have to settle for concealment (temporarily). If you can get to something that conceals you from the killer . The row of porta-potties below is an example of concealment (from behind them). A personal bias on my part but I would not hide in the porta-potty; not because it is bad concealment, but because it takes my vantage point and my mobility away.

Another aspect of cover and concealment is the use of what is known as ‘dead space’. It is amazing how little information is available on the web with regard to this topic. Dead Space refers to a spatial cavity or location that bullets cannot get into based on their trajectory (i.e. depressions in the ground/ or behind hills …dare I say grassy knolls?). Even in urban areas there are drainage ditches and small bowls in the ground that would be considered dead space/ good cover. People who are current or former military have a good understanding of what this is. You can develop your own perception on dead space by looking for ditches or depressions in the landscape/ landscape formations where you go and where you work. Something to keep in mind is that vegetation that is planted for ground cover often grows at a uniform height and can ‘hide’ dead space. Look for how the ground lays out.

Lastly, distance can be a good measure of safety from an active killer. Leaving the area, putting multiple doors and walls between you and the shooter is often the best remedy. Get behind cover and keep moving away from the shooter. If you are in an open area and there isn’t cover, concealment, or dead space run offline (at a 45 or 90 degree angle) of the killer. It is always harder to shoot at a moving target versus a stationary target. Get away and keep moving away!

In part 2 we’ll look at what to do if you are close to the killer and what to do if you are shot by the killer.

Less than 1%

2010-07-25T10:34:00.007-04:00

back in June we were in New York again for Fight Like A Girl re certification and new course material added to our class formats. While in NY I heard an interesting statistic, not sure if it is empirical, but it does sum up a good amount of anecdotal truth; less than 1% of the US population know anything of real fighting or combatives. Which probably attributes to why most bad guys will break off an attack if there is significant resistance put forth by the person who is being attacked. Criminals prefer easy targets. While at Rape Escape's East Coast Academy I ran into two guys who do Sayoc Knife Fighting as their primary martial art. I thought I knew something about knife fighting (mostly to run away!). This further confirmed that there is quite a bit to knife fighting that I don't know alot about. Thankfully there is probably less of that 1% statistic of the population that knows anything about the real use of bladed weapons. Ironic that the next course I was getting a certification in was the 3rd module in the Women's Empowerment Series - Defense Against Weapons.

Defense Against Weapons, known by its short name DAW, addresses real life situations where the attacker is using a weapon to augment his techniques. In the course we address the following issues:

Weapon psychology and dynamics of blades, guns, clubs, and flexibles (strangulation).
Defense against being choked whether from the defensive position or from being straddled on your chest.
Defense against an attacker holding a knife against your throat either parallel or across your neck.
Defense against being stabbed
What to do if you are attacked from behind with a weapon
What to do if the attacker is hitting you with a club
What to do if the attacker is holding a gun to your head (or any part of your body)
What to do when all else fails

All of this done with the same 'watch/ then do' training philosophy that is used in Fight Like A Girl coupled with stress inoculation training with the Redman Suit. We have already scheduled DAW & Fight Like A Girl Classes at North Canton Community Education and Green YMCA. By the middle of August we should have some classes scheduled with our other venues as well. In any case if you have questions or comments please send them. And above all....

Stay Safe!

Hesitation

2010-06-16T18:46:00.001-04:00

Often in my classes students will ask me "what if my mind goes blank when I am attacked or I hesitate?". Good question. My proverbial answer is "so what? no one is grading you or rating how well you fight back. The truth is; use this time to your advantage".

Hesitation its actually natural ; its hardwired into your body. Consider it this way; you have just been assaulted by a man, he may be at the pre-violence interview stage or the attack may be ensuing and at this point he is trying to gain control of you either by force or intimidation. Your body is going through extreme stress that is common to the Survival Stress Reaction. In the OODA loop that I have written about in the past this is when you are in the stage of Observing and Orienting to what is going on. Because you are rarely exposed to personal combat on a regular basis you are more than likely going to freeze or hesitate for a few seconds. Hesitation is better than freezing though!

Use this time to collect your thoughts, also verbalize what you are feeling. By talking you begin to engage a portion of your brain that also leads to action. Say something, anything; "don't do this stop, don't hurt me, I have an STD". Initiating a role-play will do 2 things. Firstly, it gives you time to recall your training and develop an action-escape plan. Secondly; it begins to get into his OODA Loop as well because now he is Observing (hearing) and Orienting (to your speech). Your role-play helps you to work through your fear as well. When you have formulated your plan launch your defense and DO NOT STOP! At this point all hesitation must be gone you have to strike without fear or regret.

If your defense doesn't go the way you expected, keep going. In the Fight Like A Girl videos you have seen how some of the girls improvised new strikes 'on the fly' during the Redman encounters, do the same. Also, remember that your environment can help you or hinder you. Is that chair in the way or is it something that you can use to strike your attacker? What else is laying around that might be used as a weapon. The common inocuous item like a food jar or a stapler can have devastating effects when you strike someone in the head. Never underestimate anything and NEVER STOP FIGHTING AND FLEEING.

Stay Safe!

Pepper Spray

2010-04-29T16:00:00.003-04:00

A weekend or so ago, I had the opportunity to do some training with PepperSpray. Mind you I have done this on two other occasions and as I recall it wasn't very fun. Those two other occasions were basically; "here step up and get sprayed and then enjoy rinsing your face off in the puke basin". This time was a bit different; it was run in stages.

Stage 1; Get sprayed
Stage 2; Move to a punching dummy and engage for 10-30 seconds
Stage 3; Move to an empty semi-automatic rifle. Load empty magazine, cycle the weapon, drop the trigger, reload, and then do it again, then drop the mag.
Stage 4; Then move to a dummy drag to simulate a man down. Pull 'him' to a safe location.
Stage 5; Radio in for assistance at safe location.

Doing all of this was difficult, to say the least. I can say upfront that by the time I got to Stage 2 I knew I was in trouble. My eyesight was pretty well gone and the pain was coming on like a freight train. I knew that the impending decontamination stage was not going to be fun. Pepper Spray always effects me badly. For this training we were using FOX Labs 5.3 SHU Law Enforcement Grade Pepper Spray. SHU means Scoville Heat Units. According to FOX Labs:

Most pepper sprays are between 1/2 million and 2 million shu. Fox pepper spray is refined to 5.3 million shu, that's like the difference in heat between paper burning and a blue-hot blowtorch (about 451 degrees F vs 2000
degrees F.) However, because of its unique formulation it does not blister
the skin. Public law enforcement agencies across the USA are using Fox Labs
OC pepper spray and Fox Labs Products.

I don't know about the last part though, as several of us had some light
blisters/ 1st degree burns below our eyes. Nothing earth shattering, and it cleared
up in a few days, but it was still mildly irritating 24 hrs later. Now for
the stuff they don't tell you. The Paramedic on standby said the
pain would last about 20 minutes. Yeah right. More like an hour and a half.
One guy had trouble controlling his breathing (he could breathe, but there was a
definitive psychological component to it). My face felt like it was
literally on fire, my eyes were swelled shut, and I had a load of snot coming out of
both nostrils. Also, I have experienced a feeling of being 'locked up' that stems from having a partially engaged gag reflex as well as hyperventilation. This time though I was able to control my breathing better and get through this. Though it did not diminish the pain in any way. The only light in the tunnel was a cold water hose and the cool breeze that was also blowing (which later led me to get out of my wet clothes as I realized I was getting into mild hypothermia). Of the 8 guys who
went through this, only 2 of them completed the entire course stages. However, all of us were incapacitated within a few minutes after being hit with the spray.

If you are going to carry Pepper Spray I recommend you carry the FOX Labs 5.3 SHU Law Enforcement Grade. I was able to buy this at D&G Uniforms in Akron. But just about any gun store or uniform shop should carry it. Also, I would get the stream, instead of the cone. The reason I advocate 'streams' over 'cones' (which has to do with the output of the spray; a straight line or a cone shaped pattern) is that there is less chance of overspray or blowback. We were training on a windy day and some of the staff were caught with the overspray from a different PepperSpray brand that dispersed as a cone. Though no one experienced blowback from the fine stream. Also, I'd recommend that you experience pepper spray by putting a little bit on your hand (be prepared to put it in a cold bucket of water) so that you have some idea of what it does in case you do experience a blowback. It is wicked stuff!

Fight Like A Girl - Refresher & Intro Courses

2010-04-05T13:09:00.004-04:00

April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month and Fight Like A Girl! - Akron will be hosting free 1 hour refresher courses/ Introductory Courses on April 28th at 7:00 PM and 8:00PM. Course location will be 215 W. Bowery Street, Akron, OH 44308. Classroom 5 & 6 in the Considine Professional Bldg.

We'll be teaching the 6 rules of FLAG, social distance, and the defensive position to new people as well. If you want to catch up on old skills, or introduce your friends to Fight Like A Girl this is the perfect opportunity. RSVP is appreciated, but not necessary. These courses are at no charge.

Frames of Reference

2010-03-22T20:11:00.006-04:00

At lunch the other day a colleague of mine, was mentioning that she was fearful the other night when she came into her apartment building foyer and found a homeless man sleeping there. Under normal circumstances this young rising professional, is a caring and compassionate lady, who often works with an indigent client population - yet this time she said she felt particularly vulnerable even though the man was doing nothing but sleeping in the hallway. While she felt some guilt on behalf of her own concerns I reminded her that she shouldn't be ashamed for being fearful. After all the human emotion of fear is a gift - according to Gavin de Becker. Why she felt fearful was because the incident was outside of her frame of reference. This incident was isolated from her normal day to day activities - as it has never happened before or at 1100 pm in the evening. This is something not normal for Akronites. However if she lived in the Bronx (NYC) where my cousin is from, it would be a normal day.

The reason some people are fearful of one thing, while others are not is based on Capt. John Boyd's theory on the OODA Loop. A mental process that every human being goes through on a regular basis. OODA stands for the process of Observing, then Orienting, then Deciding and the Acting. The picture below provides a visual representation of this split second decision making model.

The bubble with 'previous experiences' could be what we call the Frame of Reference. Things that fall outside of our references tend to create emotions especially fear. Fear in turn then drives the survival stress reaction. This is why when I provide lectures on Personal Safety or Violence Mitigation in the workplace i remind people that its OK for them to be afraid and to have perceptual distortions and physical distress when they are exposed to violence. Because, for most people, violence is outside of their frame of reference. They are otherwise, not socialized to the real impact of violence (despite what Hollywood portrays). I say most people, because outside of the military, some police and other civilians regularly train to diminish the effects of the survival stress reaction.

In any ways, how can we use the understanding of the Frame of Reference to protect ourselves? What's the Fourth Rule of Fight Like A Girl? Attract Attention. If we can get into the bad guy's OODA Loop we maybe able to short circuit his plan. Coach Tony Blauer, advocates trying to always find the disconnect in a situation. See the youtube video here for a real life example of using the disconnect (warning: profanity). In the video you'll see Tony Blauer getting into his enemy's OODA loop by playing on his 3 principles.

Hope this helps, Stay Safe!

___________________________________________________________
BTW, here is a picture of my wife hosting our table at the Akron Childrens' Hospital Wellness Fair.

Raid Panacea?

2010-02-15T19:03:00.005-05:00

Awhile back one of my client's asked about using Wasp Spray as a means to defend yourself, ala mace/ pepper spray. This is kind of a new one on me - I'd never heard of anyone advocating this (note to self: try to actually watch some TV on occasion). So I had to do some looking. The first place was google, which led me to snopes.com. According to the rumor; a can of wasp spray shoots farther (20ft.) than pepper spray, its a powerful inflammatory that will instantly cause their eyes to shut, and will cause the esophagus, trachea and resp. system to contract and inhibit breathing. My interest was piqued. There 's even a video from a self-defense expert on the use of wasp spray. Interesting.

Despite, these greatly touted claims, I have a bit more empirical mindset when it comes to testing rumors like these. First of all let me go on record as saying I am not a fan of chemical irritants/ non-lethal sprays. I'll state my reasons here:

They are hard to deploy. While working hospital security I used to carry a can on my duty belt. I only needed to swivel it up to pull it off my belt and then flip up the velcro tab to fire it. Can be done with one hand; but not easily. Try carrying it in your purse (can you imagine carrying a wasp spray can in a purse? Better be a big purse!). Most people don't wear duty belts and thus the can goes somewhere else. Also, if you are outdoors and its raining - how effective do you think the spray will be?
Chemical irritants, contrary to popular belief, do not immediately incapacitate people. Thats utter BS. I have been sprayed with OC Pepper Spray during training classes and while it does hurt (there's reason cops call it "Liquid Hell"), I can guarantee that I can still run, shoot, and fight hand to hand. In fact this is standard practice on many police dept. physical entrance exams. Against a determined attacker (stalker, abusive spouse/ boyfriend, etc) - do not expect this to stop them. Have a back up plan.
Expect blowback. If you use a chemical irritant it is possible that it could blow back against you. Rooms with fans or being outdoors where there is wind can cause a deployed chemical to come back and hit you. Another reason why police are sensitized to pepper spray (stress inoculation anyone?). Fortunately, both Wasp Spray and Pepper Spray only require flushing with water to cut the effects. See below.
Chemical spray irritants are often used incorrectly. Police use it as a distraction prior to handcuffing the subject. Defenders often seek to use it to 'hurt' an attacker which is the wrong approach. Don't get me wrong I am not feeling sorry for the attacker. But the correct technique should be to use a chemical spray as a barrier or shield to keep someone away while providing you the opportunity to escape.

So that being said we're still back at square one; Is a can of Wasp Spray better than Pepper Spray. I'll believe the claim that it can shoot farther. No doubt about that. Wasp Spray is a bigger can, has more aerosol pushing it. Just make sure that there is nobody behind the attacker that you wouldn't want to send to the hospital.

Is worse, hotter, more painful? Hmmm good question. Pepper Spray is rated in Scoville Heat Units. Law Enforcement Grade Pepper Spray is between 500,000 - 5,300,000 (ouch). Unfortunately, nobody has tested Wasp Spray on the basis of being an irritant. Therefore we need to look at it from its chemical makeup; pyrethrin. This is actually beyond my research scope so I went and asked a hospital Pharmacologist who is also an expert in toxicology. Here is the gist of my interview:

1. Is wasp spray (pyrethrin) an acute irritant? Yes, the wasp spray could be an irritant to the eyes that can result in corneal damage and to the lungs resulting in asthma exacerbations, wheezing, shortness of breath, and sneezing. An anaphlyactic reaction can occur in hypersensitive pts. I'm not sure how it compares to pepper spray with regards to onset and severity of irritant effects. Depending on the brand of wasp spray, there may be carbamate insecticides, organophosphates and/or hydrocarbons. Both the carbamates and organophosphates could cause cholinergic toxicity depending on the extent of exposure.

2. If the person using were to experience either blowback (wind) or even the aggressor using it on them, what is the first aid to remedy exposure. For exposures to pyrethrins, both skin and eye exposures would require decontamination via flushing with copious amounts of water. For inhalation exposure, remove the pt from the source of exposure and give O2 if necessary. Typically systemic toxic effects do not occur unless large quantities are ingested since they are not well absorbed through the skin. If organophosphates or carbamates are present, the toxicity could be more significant such as bradycardia, vomiting, diarrhea, bronchospasm, respiratory failure, seizures, and increased secretions therefore the pt would need immediate medical care.

Because of the different compounds that could be in various wasp sprays, toxic effects could vary and I would not recommend substituting the pepper spray for wasp spray.

There you have it folks, the straight skinny from an expert. In a similar vein, I always tell people who take classes with us; no one technique alone is 100% effective. I'd say the same thing with pepper sprays and anything that you might use to substitute them. Your best tactic is going to be to fall back on the Principles that we work on in Fight Like A Girl (pay attention, stay with people, use barriers, get help, make space, and never fight on his terms). Hope this helps clears things up some.

Stay Safe!

What people are saying about Fight Like A Girl...

2009-12-27T14:28:00.003-05:00

Selected feedback:

Thank you so much for teaching me this! It made me feel so much more confident now.
The steps were realistic and helpful - I enjoyed the class so much.
Thank you so much, you pretty much just saved my life.
It was lots of fun and I feel more confident if it ever happens to me. Thank you!
Thank you so much for working with me, despite my fears, working through these techniques has helped to empower me.
This course should be taught to every girl in school.
I liked doing the techniques on the Redman Suit.
I had a very great time! It was fun learning how to defend yourself!
The class rocked! Both my mother and I are very pleased with what we learned. I am looking forward to learning more and practicing more. I eventually want to take Girls on Guard.
Thank you Brian and Eileen!!! for yesterday's training.
Great Job, learned alot.

Well we are pretty much done for 2009. It was a busy year and we have continued to grow with our program, community and repertoire of classes. Our goal was to run at least 1 class per month and we easily surpassed that number by early fall.

Look for us in 2010 with more Fight Like A Girl, Girls on Guard, Child Awareness Rapid Escape training. We'll also be adding a women's handgun course that is a combination of psychological training, realistic targets, and Fight Like A Girl material - which we're still trying to find a name for. Email us if you have ideas. ;-)

Stay Safe!
Brian & Eileen & Crew

Like CPR?

2009-11-29T11:24:00.003-05:00

Awhile back I had the opportunity to attend an Outdoor Survival Course through the Northeast Ohio Primitive Living Center. Great program... everything you would see Les Stroud do on SURVIVORMAN was taught in this course. Some of the thingsw e learned to do was how to make a small fire and then wrap a blanket around yourself and create a chimney for the smoke wich would allow the small fire to heat you. or how to salvage car seat material to use as insulation. The instructor often remarked: "you can read this in any survival or primitive living book, but until you do it... its another story. You have to do this, to understand it. Its entirely experiential".

I couldn't agree more! One of the key methods of learning is through what educators call kinesthetic learning. According to Wikipedia:

Kinesthetic learning is a teaching and learning style in which learning takes place by the student actually carrying out a physical activity, rather than listening to a lecture or merely watching a demonstration. Some people are visual learners, some kinesthetic learners, and some are auditory learners.

Interestingly, the least effective learning style is most often auditory learning. Adult learners lose interest in a lecture within 30 seconds to 2 minutes. For this reason the American Heart Association stopped using an instructor driven CPR course and now uses a video driven course. This is because unless an instructor is very good at presenting the course material it likely the class will lose interest. I know, I'm an AHA Instructor.

The other aspect of the class is that you actually have to learn how to do CPR by........(drumroll) doing it! Yes, thats right, unfortunately until we develop Matrix level technology that will allow us to 'mind dream' or do simple auditory/ visual learning - CPR, outdoor survival, and self-defense skills must all be developed the old fashioned way; repetition for muscle memory.

So drawing on success from other adult learning programs I have developed the Fight Like A Girl and the Child Awareness Rapid Escape courses to work on similar principles. Thats why in my programs you will here few war stories and we will concentrate on developing YOUR Potential.

As the old saying goes; "I can show you the door, but you must go through it".

Stay Safe!

Teaching our children to fight...

2009-11-09T20:19:00.004-05:00

When I grew up I was always taught not to get in fights, just walk away. Sound advice, if you grew up in the 1950s; unfortunately that doesn't work for today's society. Even more so it is dangerous to advise children NOT To fight. Why?

I love Bill Gates marketing slogan; "I'm a PC". Because for the most part thats very true. What we program into our heads is what we get back. Thats why I feel its very important that we need to build a defensive program into our children, one that is based on resistance and fighting back against predators. Yes I will concur with the naysayers that a 3 year old may not be able to fight back effectively against an adult predator. But giving them the building blocks (physical skills) and doing regular training on these skills that child will have developed the muscle memory to fight if they are attacked/ abducted later in life. If we tell our children they shouldn't fight but then we expect them to fight for their life at a later time when a rapist or child molester tries to abduct them - haven't we really sent them a mixed message? We teach our children safety all of the time; biking, swimming, fire, first aid, hazards, etc. The time to enable our children is when their programming is still young and when they have the time to practice and in-grain self-protection skills that will serve them later in life.

Now, please let me caveat my words - this isn't to say that we must teach them how to be cruel little monsters that go around inflicting harm on other people because we have taught them to. But rather to temper realistic self defense training with a firm moral compass. While my children have been taught to fight back, which includes where and how to strike someone to really hurt them - they are also taught and expected to know when to use the skills and in what context. This is the other end of training that parents must continue to be obligated to as well.

We ran a CARE Class last week with North Canton Community Education; where we had 15 boys and girls in the class and the parents were there as well (Thanks Mom and Dad!) - we taught them the basics of how to fight back against an abductor. Check out the video down below on some of the class material.

The Ugly Truth....

2009-10-27T22:33:00.002-04:00

The Fourth Rule (or strategy concept) in Fight Like A Girl is to attract attention. The reason for this is that we are playing on the criminals fear that someone may be able to identify the attacker or they may be able to help. But we must never expect other people to help. Thats why you must fight for your life because, YOU ARE FIGHTING FOR YOUR LIFE. The Ugly Truth is that we live in a social culture that is in crisis - expecting people to help us is a recipe for disaster (there are a few courageous people out there - but they are few and far between). The story below illustrates what I am speaking to.

Witnesses Didn't Help Rape Victim

RICHMOND, Calif. (Oct. 27) - Police believe as many as a dozen people watched a 15-year-old girl get beaten and gang-raped outside her high school homecoming dance without reporting it.

Two suspects were in custody Monday, but police said as many as five other men attacked the girl over a two-hour period Friday night outside Richmond High School. "She was raped, beaten, robbed and dehumanized by several suspects who were obviously OK enough with it to behave that way in each other's presence," Lt. Mark Gagan said. "What makes it even more disturbing is the presence of others. People came by, saw what was happening and failed to report it." The victim remained hospitalized with non-life-threatening injuries.

Manuel Ortega, 19, was arrested at the scene and was being held on $800,000 bail for investigation of rape and robbery. He is not a student at the school. Richmond police Sgt. David Harris said he did not know if Ortega had retained an attorney. A 15-year-old student also was booked late Monday on one count of sexual assault, Gagan said. Police said the girl left the dance and was walking to meet her father for a ride home when a classmate invited her to join a group drinking in the courtyard. The victim had drank a large amount of alcohol by the time the assault began, police said.

Officers received a tip about a possible assault on campus and found the girl semi-conscious near a picnic table. Marin Trujillo, a spokesman for the West Contra Costa Unified School District, said there were four police officers and three school administrators monitoring the dance, but the assault happened away from the gym.

(source:http://news.aol.com/article/girl-gang-raped-at-richmond-california/737436)

Shedding New Light on an Old Topic

2009-10-15T21:40:00.002-04:00

As I have mentioned in the past I am a big fan of some of the high lumen flashlights that are out on the market. LED Technology has come a long way and we can see this in the newest line of lights made by Fenix. What immediately prompted me to research these lights in more depth was the strobe feature that many of them sport. For awhile I have been pushing the Surefire line since they were the originators of the tactical flashlight. But then I had a conversion experience so to speak.

A few months back I had the opportunity to do some tactical SWAT training through a different venue. One of the guys on the entry team had a Fenix TA30 hooked up to his entry rifle and when he came in to the darkened building with it going on strobe I was immediately blinded by the 180+ lumens. And to boot, I had trouble tracking his movement since the strobe was tricking my iris to open and close at a rate that was below that of the strobe. The feeling was a sense of visual overload, essentially this light got into my OODA Loop!

After the initial "oooh wow that was cool!" we got to talking about it. His optic bayonet was a Fenix TA30. While slightly unwieldy to carry its still a heck of a bargain at $98 it also has 4 settings (low, medium, turbo, and strobe; each with their own power consumption rates). So this gets me to thinking if some of the other models can easily be slipped into a pocket or a purse. Lo and behold Fenix has done their work and made smaller models as well. I picked up a $53.00 LD1 for Eileen to try out (which also runs on 1 AA battery - nice!). I thought about making a video and posting it to YouTube but it seems that someone else has beat me to it. <---Check it out. If your still considering a tactical flashlight as part of your personal protection arsenal. I strongly suggest the Fenix line of flashlights.

Stay Safe!

Anything worth doing once.........

2009-09-07T11:13:00.006-04:00

Well its been a busy Summer and now it seems to be drawing to a close. We've ran several private classes, we've been to Chicago to learn the CARE (Child Awareness Rapid Escape Curriculum), plus picked up a fair number of consulting jobs on the side as well. Our new Fall curriculum picks up at North Canton Community Education (see below for classes). Therefore my apologies about not blogging more here at Fight Like A Girl! - Akron.

Without further ado; as the blog title says anything worth doing once...... is worth doing twice (at the very least). At least when it comes to fighting. Too often our perception about what a real fight is and how it materializes (actually 'deteriorates' is a better descriptor) is so heavily influenced by what we have seen from Hollywood. The reality is that you are fighting for your life! And you can not expect any Hollywood magic to bail you out. Therefore, you have to mean what you say and what you do!

That means that if you say NO, you need to say it more than once. Lace it with profanity too; ___ NO! Get the ____ AWAY from Me! Be loud and be vocal. If you have to hit or kick - don't expect that one shot will be sufficient. That's why when I have ladies hit me in the Redman Suit (especially) in the groin - I say to lay it on and hit multiple time (2 or 3 at least). One hit is never enough! Same thing with kicks to the midline, multiple strikes is what is necessary to fight a guy off of you. Remember when you are practicing you'll not want to hurt your training partner but you've got to integrate that hard kicking in somewhere - find a surface that you can use for kicking. Ideally a punching bag, or focus bag, if you don't have that you could use a foam pad or mattress stood up against the wall.

Lastly, remember not to kick flatfooted; this doesn't generate a lot of power. Instead what you need to is kick with the heel of your foot, this way you are generating maximum power into your strike (this is the kind of power that is bone breaking).

In any ways, wherever you find yourself...

Stay Safe!

Akron Family Attacked by Mob of Teenagers

2009-07-23T18:32:00.004-04:00

If you live in Akron and haven't heard of the above story then your name must be Rip Van Winkle. Friends of mine from Cleveland to Atlanta GA have been emailing me about it. The story, which is getting a lot of air time can be read at here. What prompted me to delve into this story is when I heard someone talking about it and they remarked "what was going through those kids heads?" ...kind of in your older generational tone.

Well I know what was going through their heads, but before i get into that let me back things up a few years. Awhile back I did some consulting in business continuity for a firm that anticipated a significant rise in crime if there was a major disruption in the surrounding metropolitan infrastructure (utilities, law enforcement, food supply, etc). One of the concerns with this was the possibility of a rioting mob. Things I had to consider were how to securing the buildings, target hardening, and area denial. When I start thinking about how to defuse or dissolve a hostile situation I instantly try to get into the mind of my opponent by studying their OODA Loop - this is the decision making process that everybody goes through in milliseconds. If you get into a persons decision making process you are then essentially running circles around them. From there you could look into Sun Tzu maxim on "knowing yourself and knowing your enemy" for starting to understand what drives and motivates your enemies. This lead me to do some more research into mob psychology just so I could get a baseline for understanding how to diffuse or dissolve a mob. I had to think like them first!

Some of the things I discovered about mobs is that when people begin to associate collectively (gang up) they undergo a transformation in that they view themselves as powerful, they are not responsible individually, and that their actions are right irregardless of their individual beliefs. Often people will display a temporary psychosis and do things that they would otherwise never do on their own. As a friend of mine who did some considerable amount of Urban Warfare training courtesy of Uncle Sam's Misguided Children would often say (without the colorful expletives) "when the head count goes up, the overall IQ of the group goes down". While that may not be correct at a chess match it does ring true with a street mob; who will allow a sort of group think to run the show. The insidious part of a mob's psychology is that it can also be directed (dare i say aimed) by only a small number of ringleaders. In the case of the Marshall family they were in serious trouble and they are lucky to be alive.

So how do you diffuse a mob? Let's just say that's CLASSIFIED. But what you might want to really know how to do is how do you survive a mob/ riot. Fortunately that information is readily available. At wikihow they have some pretty good ideas to keep you safe:

Be prepared. If you know an area is ripe for a riot but you can't avoid traveling there, take some simple precautions to help protect yourself. Wear clothes that minimize the amount of exposed skin--long pants and long-sleeve shirts, for instance--when going out, and think about your possible escape routes and safe havens before anything actually happens. Carry some cash with you in case you need to quickly arrange transportation, pay off looters, or bribe police at a checkpoint. If you're traveling abroad, register with your country's consulate and carry your passport and/or visa with you at all times.
Remain calm. Riots bring intense emotions boiling to the surface, but if you want to survive one you'd be better off keeping yours in check. Your adrenaline and survival instincts will kick in, but try to think rationally and pursue safety methodically.
Get inside and stay inside. Typically riots occur in the streets or elsewhere outside. Being inside, especially in a large, sturdy structure, can be your best protection to weather the storm. Keep doors and windows locked, avoid watching the riot from windows or balconies, and try to move to inside rooms, where the danger of being hit by stones or bullets is minimized. Try to find at least two possible exits in case you need to evacuate the building in a hurry. Try to contact police or your country's consulate to let them know where you are, and be on the lookout for signs of fire. If the building is set on fire get out quickly. If rioters are targeting the building and gain entry, try to sneak out or hide.
Stay on the sidelines. If you're caught up in a riot, don't take sides. Try to look as inconspicuous as possible, and slowly and carefully move to the outside of the mob. Stay close to walls or other protective barriers if possible.
Avoid being hit by riot control chemicals. Police may deploy riot control agents (tear gas, for example) to disperse a crowd. These chemicals can cause severe pain, respiratory distress, and blindness. Try to stay away from the front lines of a riot, and learn to recognize the signs that a riot control agent has been used and how to handle exposure.
Move away from the riot. The more time you spend in the midst of a riot, the greater your chance of being injured or killed. That said, in most circumstances it's better to move out of a riot slowly. If you run, you will draw attention to yourself, so it's usually best to walk. It can also be dangerous to move against a crowd, so go with the flow until you are able to escape into a doorway or up a side street or alley. It may also be advantageous to stay with the crowd until you are certain you can safely escape because it will help you remain inconspicuous and improve your odds of survival if shots are fired.
- Think of crowd movement like currents in the ocean. In a large riot, the crowd in the middle will be moving faster than the people on the perimeters. As such, if you find yourself in the middle, you should not try to move in a different direction, but follow the flow and slowly make your way to the outside. This requires patience in order to work properly.
- Avoid major roads. Major roads, squares, and other high traffic areas are likely to be crowded with rioters. If possible, stick to less-traveled side streets to avoid the mobs.
- Avoid public transportation. Buses, subways, and trains will likely be out of service, and stations and depots will probably be packed with people. Even if you succeed in getting on a train or bus, rioters may stop it. Subway stations are particularly bad places to be, both because they are generally difficult to escape and because riot control agents are generally heavier than air and may drift down into subway stations and accumulate there.
- Don't stop your car. If you're lucky enough to have a car that you can drive away from the riot, drive quickly and try not to stop for anything until you've reached someplace you know is safe. If people seem to block your escape route; honk your horn, and carefully drive through or around them at a moderate speed, and they should get out of the way.
  - Driving towards Police lines can be interpreted by the Police as a preparation to use the car as a weapon against them. Police are trained and prepared to protect themselves against deadly threats meaning that you may be shot at if they think you are going to run them down with a car.
  - Activist fear of cars can be a reality as there have been numerous cases of irate non-participants running down protesters. Any pushing though the crowd should be done with the demeanor of patience, aggression may lead to an attempt to disable your car before it is used as a weapon.
Get to a safe place, and stay put. Choose a safe haven carefully. Sometimes it can be as close as your hotel room, but other times you'll need to get out of the country entirely. If you're abroad, you will generally want to head to your country's embassy or the airport. Try to contact the embassy before going there, however, to let them know you're coming and to find out if it is safe to go there. If a mob is gathered outside, embassy staff may be able to direct you to a safer place. In any case, just try to put as much distance as possible between yourself and the riot.

Hope this helps,

Stay Safe!

Going in Harm's Way? FREE TRAINING

2009-07-10T10:54:00.002-04:00

If there are Ladies out there who will be deployed overseas with the military or who will be working in a humanitarian capacity anywhere within the world and you fear for your safety and feel that the Fight Like A Girl Program would help you please contact us. We will be happy to provide training free of charge for ladies who are going in harm's way.

Also, we want to give our program away (Yes, that's correct give - no charge) the program away 1x per quarter, to non-profit women/ girls' groups that believe that the FLAG, GOG, or WE CARE curriculum would benefit their organization's members. Please contact us at bvandersall@neo.rr.com

Fight Like A Girl - Akron is committed to helping people make the world safer through empowering them to be confident to protect themselves or others. We believe that self-defense should be simple and easy to learn within hours and days, not months and years.

Stay Safe!

The Ladies Primer to College Safety

2009-06-24T21:23:00.005-04:00

So you are headed off to college in the fall and now your starting to think about what you might need to know while you are there. So what do you need to know to stay safe?

1. Where's home base? Are you staying on campus or off campus? Commuting to community college? Remember that in Fight Like A Girl we say that you need to be aware of the people around you and your environment. Why? Because the 3rd Rule "keep a barrier between you and the bad guy" is about knowing your environment. Figure out where you will be. Get a college map, street atlas, or city map and put a dot for home base. This is a point of safety.

2. Now Identify other points of safety around you. Is there a campus security office, security safety phone station, a dorm safe room, how about a well lit area that has people and video cameras (i.e. gas station/ convenience store)? Now put these dots on your map. They are secondary points of safety. These are places where you can go to get help. (Go to people).

3. Now familiarize yourself with the campus. Understand the campus layout - what streets go where, etc. Figure out where your classes are, what halls you will be in, will you be there after dark for any classes? Identify any tertiary (or 3rd level) of safety points. Can you go here if need be? Try to memorize this. Also, make sure that your routes are well lit as well (no hidden blind spots).

4. Gets yourself a Surefire or other 100 lumen pocket flashlight. Carry it everywhere - you can use this to check out dark areas and also to blind a bad guy.

5. Lastly, try to find other ladies that are traveling in the same direction. Develop a buddy system. Educate your friends to be safe and teach them what you already know.

Ultimately, Stay Safe!

We Care [actually we just started]

2009-05-28T20:35:00.005-04:00

May was kind of a doozy of a month. With all that spring brings and the great weather and several side projects that require my time away from Fight Like A Girl - I have been doing a few things on business development. One of these is a security consulting project that I can't discuss further (sorry!). The other was a blitz trip to Chicago to show you how we care. Actually, that's WE CARE an acronym for Winning Edge's Child Awareness Rapid Escape program. WE CARE is the brainchild of Bruce Gunderson and Staff in conjunction with Brad Parker the Founder of Fight Like A Girl/ Rape Escape. What I like so much about WE CARE is that its principles for training and its techniques for children are very much in line with the philosophy of the Fight Like A Girl program. The techniques are simple to learn, easy to retain, and the discussion is geared for children. In the program we teach them simple rhymes that they can remember (i.e. if your in the store, don't go out the door, without your mom) and give them the opportunity to practice dialing on a cell phone for help (remember to push the green button). We also teach them tactics that abductors use to lure children and what they need to do if someone approaches them. Also the kids learn physical techniques to avoid being carried away, taken through a door, thrown into a vehicle trunk, as well as the beginnings of the defensive position from the FLAG series. So now that WE CARE we hope to begin to roll out this program to the Northeastern Ohio communities. If you have an organization (church, school, or social group) that would benefit from this program please contact us.

Staying in the Fight

2009-04-22T20:10:00.003-04:00

While in the Rape Escape curriculum the primary emphasis is on escaping, getting away from the rapist or attacker. But sometimes that is not an option because for whatever reason he may have you cornered, trapped or your already injured, or maybe your children are nearby. In this case you have to stay in the fight, you have to bring all your weapons to bear and you must do everything you can to stay alive - you also have to make one of the toughest decisions of your life; and that's to determine that you must inflict significant bodily injury on your attacker. The techniques in Rape Escape if done even moderately well are more than effective, they can be deadly. But you have to be willing to make the decision to intentionally harm your attacker (that means multiple unceasing strikes). While you may think; "oh I will be able to do that when the time comes"... the topic bears further contemplation than what you may think. Dr. Ignatius Piazza of Front Sight Firearms states; "these are terrible decisions to make, and we would like to avoid them at all costs. However, if you do not make the decision in advance, I guarantee that you will hesitate to make them later and that hesitation may make the difference between you living and dying". To this end I implore you to do some serious soul searching and determine that if you must fight back that you have no qualms of doing it in a devastating manner.

On the flip side of this if you are injured or maimed during an attack you have to consciously make the decision to stay in the fight. That means you don't give up - you continue fighting even through your own pain and tears if need be. While I am sure you are thinking that I have stepped off the deep edge here and your thinking easier said than done. Let me give you a case in point to illustrate my point.

Stacy Lim, an off-duty LAPD Officer, pulled into her driveway after a relaxing evening of softball. When she got out of her car she was immediately surrounded by gangbangers who had followed her home intent on carjacking her. The first thing she did was announce that she was a police officer. The lead gang banger responded by firing a .357 magnum round into her chest, which penetrated her heart and exited leaving a tennis ball sized hole out of her back. Stacy Lim stayed in the fight, she not only returned fire she became the aggressor and pursued her assailant shooting him multiple times. The other gangbangers fled the scene. Stacy then walked to her house, pulled the magazine from her sidearm and threw it into the bushes 9though she does not remember this), dialed 911 and collapsed. Her attacker died. Stacy also died 2 times on the operating table, she required 108 pints of blood and 8 months later she was back in uniform with the LAPD. Her motto is "you must train the mind for where your body must go".
(source: On Combat by Lt. Col. Dave Grossman, p.144)

Stacy's secret weapon - she was Stress Inoculated. That means she was trained to push herself beyond her limits. Ideally in Fight Like A Girl we would train hard but after the first class you need time for the mind digest the training you've had. Although one class should never be considered sufficient, you should practice the techniques often. We did them on mats, but you should see what happens when you go to the defensive position on concrete, if you get hurt doing this... continue! Never stop because you are injured always stay in the fight. Keep Practicing and Stay Safe!

Awareness Beyond Awareness

2009-04-03T16:27:00.002-04:00

Would you believe me if I told you that you have a built in extra-sensory radar that will let you know when bad people are around or when something bad is going to happen? At first glance you are going to tell me I am full of it and what am I trying to sell you. Hold on there......before you click away (and no this isn't the Matrix) hear me out.

The truth is that you do have an innate ability to sense when someone who is bad is around you. You may not fully understand, but i can guarantee that you do have this ability and you have used it before. For instance; ever meet a guy who just gives you the "creeps"? Something about just seems "bad"? Thats your ESP (i'd say women's intuition - but men possess this ability too - cops are notoroiusly good for having correct gut impulses).

An excellent book to read that delves into this issue in depth is Gavin de Becker's Gift of Fear. An absolute must read for understanding how our spirit and mind work together to gives us cues to understand when we are in dire circumstances. OK your probably thinking now; "I have read this before in one of your other blog posts - give me something new that I don't already know".

OK I'll give you a few things to prove what i am talking about. First of all have you ever driven down the road and looked at someone and they turned and looked at you? I bet its happened several times and you may have been someone looking back as well! Since we are social creatures we tend to know when other people are looking/ staring at us. Ever been somewhere in public and had the feeling that someone was behind you that you didn't previously know about and when you turned around and looked there was someone there? Its real.

Now here's where the strange, gets stranger. You can do this next exercise on your self or with a friend. Take something with lots of metal content. A key probably won't be as effective as a group of keys. Have the other person close their eyes. Tell them to tell you when their head hurts. Now hold the keys (or metal object) within a half inch of their forehead. They should have an uncomfortable feeling in their head when you do this. Try it on yourself also. Now try it with just your fingers (no metal object).

So if you did the above your probably asking what is going on, why does this happen? The Asian cultures have a belief that there is a field of energy that is produced within and permeating the body. They call this chi or ki. We know that the body runs on electrical impulses this is why things like AEDs (Automatic Electronic Defribillatorss) can help someone during a heart attack and that electricity can cause pain but not damage (i. the case of the Taser which produces high voltage but low amperage). This chi or ki is most likely this energy field that surrounds & permeates us. Having been in the martial arts for well over 25 years I've seen alot of parlor tricks that claim ki or chi power. Some of it is just that - parlor tricks & physics (breaking blocks,laying on a bed of nails, walking on hot coals, taking repeated kicks in the groin). Some of it is not.

Let me explain some more. Harold Saxon Burr Harold Saxon Burr (1889-1973), researched this in 1932-1956. He claimed that diseases could be traced to this field, and be prevented or cured by changes in people’s life fields. These fields are electric and magnetic, and disappear when people die. Now it gets wierder; A russian physiologist named LL Vasiliev expounds on Burr's theory that states there is another field further from us called the T-field (or the thought field). His theory is that the T-field exists several feet beyond the person and can actually understand vibrations in the emotional thoughts of other people. He likens it to all of your 5 senses being spiritualized. Think about this way; you can visualize another place that your not at, you can smell what is in that place, hear what is in that place, recall the touch of that place, taste what is in that place. Thats kind of how I think the t-field works. Don't get me wrong, I am not an expert in this by any means - in fact I'm not really a student. Just a normal guy who has experienced some very odd things and is trying to find rational answers.

So how does it work? Well in my first martial art; American Karate we used to do a drill known as Randori. In Randori you would stand in the center of this huge 40'x 40' mat. On the outside of the mat are the rest of the students. The person in the center would stand their and wait until someone stepped out of the ring to attack them and then they would do their defense. While I was in the upper ranks (green, brown, red, and black) we were required to keep our eyes closed until attacked. Over time, I found that I was able to react spontaneously faster than normal because I often would know not only the direction that the attacker was coming but almost how they were going to attack me (i.e. head lock, front choke, take-down). Mind you this wasn't something that I picked up in a day or a few months, but it seemed to develop with years of study. Can I still do this? I wish I could.

But i have been able to pick up some other things along the way. People I have a close relationship with I usually "know" a few seconds ahead of time when they are calling me on the phone or sending an email (now if I could just see the numbers of that winning lotto ticket!). There have been several studies on ESP and while there are people out there who will show you how to develop it that's not really what my blog is about. What I want to leave you with; is that there really is something to an awareness beyond awareness but its ultra-sophistication at one end of the spectrum (My randori experience) still begins from an inate ability that EVERYONE has. To this end, trust your instincts......... because you are probably right!
Stay Safe!

Understanding Fear

2009-03-25T18:02:00.004-04:00

Understanding fear and how it effects us is so very important to any thing that we do. Fear can arise out of a variety of factors. I know there have been times when I let my fear of embarrassing myself get to me so bad that I in fact did embarrass myself because I was so nervous to speak in front of an audience. If you have taken any my classes you may not notice that I have an innate fear of public speaking. But then again I am in my realm of expertise; I have been teaching martial arts since I was 16, and workplace violence issues for at least 8 years. I am pretty confident in this subject matter. However, ask me to stand up before a room of 100 people and talk about statistical variance analysis and I am going to have considerable trouble and become quite red faced. So enough about me, look at the girl in the picture - while her face is partially concealed its fairly apparent that she is reacting to fear.

As Gavin de Becker so eloquently put it;"Men fear that women will laugh at them, women fear that men will kill them". His statement speaks to the primal issues that surround us as humans; both male and female. Irregardless of our gender and our primal fear there is still an automatic bodily function at work here. This is because fear is a chain reaction in the brain that starts with a stressful stimulus and ends with the release of chemicals that cause a racing heart , fast breathing and energized muscles , among other things, also known as the fight-or-flight response. We know that from previous blog entries that there is more than just fight or flight - we can also have posturing and submission. Specifically though there is the fear stimulus, this is what our brain processes - in the picture the girl is reacting to the man's telegraphed punch/ or threatened punch. We then know that her heart rate is up and she is reacting either by cowering (a submission response) or putting her hands up to protect herself (a learned response).

Darren Laur in his excellent research article The Anatomy of Fear breaks down what happens as fear manifests in the brain's amygdala and how it is sympathetic to the heart rate. As the heart rate goes up the ability to respond to the fear stimuli becomes worse. See below:

At 115 beats per minute (bpm) most people will lose fine complex motor skills such as finger dexterity, eye/hand co-ordination, multi-tasking becomes difficult.
At 145 bpm, most people will lose complex motor skills & experience auditory exclusion (they quit hearing).
At 175 bpm, it is not uncommon for a person to have difficulty remembering what took place & visual tracking becomes difficult.
At 185-220 bpm, most people will go into a state of "hypervigilance," also commonly known as the "deer in the headlights" or "brain fart mode." It is not uncommon for a person to continue doing things that are not effective (known as a feedback loop)

If this is what happens how does anyone survive a scenario where they are afraid? Especially one where they are in fear of their lives? Good question. What we first have to come to grips with is what is best operational range for our heart to be at. fortunately this research is already done. Bruce Siddle wrote the book Sharpening The Warrior’s Edge The Psychology and Science Of Training and coined the term Survival Stress Reaction or SSR. Through his research he found that a fighters optimum heart rate is between 115 - 145 bpm. the reason for this is because that's when the body's gross motor responses are best utilized (consider that in Fight Like A Girl we teach to use a kick technique in the Rape Escape Position that is just a simple cock your leg and extend with full power - thats gross motor!).

So how do we keep our heart in the 115-145 bpm range? We do this with what I call stress training. Thats when we put the Redman suit on and you actually experience fighting a man off of you. Although there is more to this than just the Redman Suit we also use some of Darren's research in our training program as well. Here's a few points from his article that we do:

Training for combat "must" be gross motor based. Why? Because we know that during combat, SSR will negatively effect fine/complex motor skill performance no matter how well trained! We stay away from techniques that require fine motor skills.

For any skill taught, there must always be a plan "B" abort strategy conditioned as well. We must not be teaching multiple defences (responses) to a specific type of attack (stimulus). The reason for this is HICKS LAW! We don't teach more than one technique for a stimuli and fortunately everything we do builds on itself. This isn't a martial art where you are trying to develop a vast toolbox of interesting techniques.

Hicks Law basically states the following: the average reaction time given one stimulus one response is about _ second. If we now teach a student a second technique (response) to the same attack (stimulus) we WILL increase a person’s reaction time by 58%. On the street we want to DECREASE reaction time, not increase it. If we teach multiple defences to one specific attack, the brain will take time deciding which option to use. This increased reaction time could mean the difference between life and death.

Instructors should always teach a new technique in slow motion. Why? It allows the student’s brain time to observe the technique and begin the "soft wiring process" which becomes "hard wired" through physical and mental training in conjunction with repetition, as long as it is gross motor skilled.

All physical skills should be chunked or partitioned into progressive steps, rather than taught all at once. We do this too, consider the Rape Escape Position and its defenses against choking, hitting, and rape.

Once the skill sets are learned, they must now be applied in dynamic training in order to make the stimulus/response training as real as possible. Again, the more the real the training, the better-prepared one becomes for the reality of the street.

While we do alot of the right things, there is still more that we can do - but we just don't have time for this in a 3 hour course. Plus, your mind needs time to digest what you have learned. Practicing a technique helps you become more proficient with it. Also, we need to put time into realistic scenarios (i.e. in the parking lot, in a small room, while walking past someone, and in areas that are poorly lighted). While the Fight Like A Girl class is intended to make you as comfortable and relaxed so that you can learn, real life is usually quite the opposite. To this end as the weather warms up I'll begin offering some advanced scenario classes for my prior students. I hope to be able to address some of these SSRs in the context with which they may find you and hopefully give you the confidence to escape.

Stay Safe!

Armed & Female

2009-03-10T21:25:00.008-04:00

To blatantly steal the title from one of my favorite authors on the subject of women's self defense, Paxton Quigley, I wanted to put some informative food for thought out there on the subject of women and weapons. Invariably, when I give lectures on self-defense and try to provide real life solutions that are workable most of the time I get someone in the audience who wants to trump the lecture by going straight to the issue of firearms.

My answer is sometimes also a bit shocking. I think firearms have their place in a woman's options for self-defense. The problem that I often see with people and firearms is that they tend to view a gun as an "end-all-be-all" and that merely owning it will keep them safe. I couldn't disagree more. Even if you are carrying armed the first 2 Rules of Fight Like A Girl (1. Be aware of your surroundings, 2. Go with people or stay with people) definitely still apply to any situation. Furthermore, while there are several ladies out there who are very capable with a firearm - don't ever mistake the idea that 12 hour NRA Basic Pistol Class to get your Concealed Weapons Permit is sufficient for training. While thse are excellent classes to familiarize yourself with basic operating functions of the firearm - they probably didn't take it to the level that you need to really defend yourself. Let me ask you a few questions:

1. Did they address the reactionary gap?
2. Did they explain that most shootings/ fights/ attacks take place in under 3 feet? And what to do if the person is face to face with you?
3. Did you shoot while laying on the ground?
4. Did you shoot in darkness or low light?
5. Did they address weapon retention?
6. Did you do any training with a simulated firearm and a realistic attacker?

These are important issues for a woman who is going to carry a firearm for defense. Please understand I am not belittling anyone in particular's training course. There are many good instructor's out there - but too often they see things from a man's perspective. If your at a training class ask the instructor if they might give you some instruction in techniques for the above questions. Most of these are pretty simple and you can pretty much Google them for how to videos. The key to all of this is that with any weapon or implement its important to train and familiarize yourself with what you may have to go through to save your life or another's.

Stay Safe!

The Achilles Heel Rapist

2009-02-25T19:33:00.003-05:00

After a lecture or at the end of a Fight Like A Girl course I always open the floor to a Q&A session. These Q&As help to debrief on the training and also to provide more detailed advice on different scenarios that ladies are concerned with. Invariably though I get thrown a curve-ball scenario.

One of these scenarios was of a rapist, who was stalking women in the shopping mall parking lots, his MO was to hide under cars in the parking lot and when the woman would come out to their cars he would cut their Achilles tendon and then pull them helplessly under the car. So what do you do in that situation?

To say that I wasn't exactly sure what to say would be kind of an understatement. My mind was trying to conceptualize what kind of car the guy was hiding under (probably not a Smart Car), 1st of all it would have to be a car with considerable ground clearance. Secondly, I was trying to figure out what happens when you lose your flexor muscles (oooh I should have paid more attention to Anatomy 101). Well off to do some research.

Interesting enough the great myth busters Snopes .com has this very scenario listed as an unfounded rumor. See here:

Claim: Thieves lie in wait under victims' cars, then render their victims helpless by slashing their ankles.

Status: False

Irregardless, not to dismiss it as unfounded rumor - I actually asked one of the doctors at my day job is (you didn't actually think I make millions off of Fight Like A Girl did you?) what would happen if someone cut your Achilles tendon - this got a few raised eyebrows and after some explaining he was more on board with humoring me. The Achilles Tendon connects the calf muscle to the heel bone. It lets you rise up on your toes and push off when you walk or run. Even if it were severed - you could still pull your foot up so as to use the heel of your foot as a strike/ thrust kick at the creep under the car.

Something else to consider is that human reaction to a pain or fear stimulus is usually to move back from the stimuli. We get this from being children and learning what happens when you touch something hot (or an electric fence... which was one of my experiences). Therefore say some under the car creeper cut your ankle, chances are good that your natural stimulus to react to the pain will be to step back with the other foot. You'll probably also fall down (protect your head) but now you'll be aligned with the guy under the vehicle. If he still has your foot, you can kick with the other leg. Instead of kicking the center line, you'll be kicking directly at his face since he is laying down to and perpendicular to you. So fight back and turn his face into hamburger. Be sure to yell and make noise (Rule #4). Profanity also has a way of turning heads too, especially when it comes from a woman.

So I hope this helps you consider what you might do in a worse case scenario. In the future i hope to run some advanced classes that would actually make use of defense in and around vehicles. Anways stay posted and Stay Safe!

The Economics of Crime

2009-02-12T19:17:00.006-05:00

Awhile back I did a post on whether or not crime and downturn economies are linked (or whether or not people associate the two in correlation) and at that time I didn't have a very good answer. Gerald Celente of the Trends Research Center states that because of the coming Depression we are going to see more crime, robberies, and violent kidnappings. Now ABC News says that Phoenix Arizona is the Kidnap Capitol of the US. Here you have two independent sources stating the same thing.

That starts to make me think. If you believe in the "stream of consciousness" that is proffered by the predictive linguists at Half Past Human then maybe there is something to fear of economic downturns and crime. Consider the new movie coming out with Liam Neeson playing an intelligence operative who has to find the people who have taken his daughter. Scary stuff ...unless you are prepared for worst case scenarios.

Therefore, I say - Take stock of yourself, face your fears, and get training to meet the worst head on - whatever it may be. Remember the most powerful words you can ever utter in a worst case sceanrio is "I have done this before and I can do it again".

Stay Safe!

Can my daughter take this class?

2009-02-01T19:37:00.005-05:00

Fight Like A Girl Akron is gearing up for the 2009 Year with new classes being offered. For the winter time we'll be offering a class a month (Feb, March, April) at the North Canton City Schools - Community Education. To take the class you'll have to sign up through NCCS.

One of the questions often asked is: "can my daughter take this course?". My answer to this is pretty much yes, but with the following caveat: How mature is your daughter? This is a course about learning to stop a rapist from raping you. That last sentence there should tell you whether or not your daughter is old enough to take the course. Its not that the physical techniques are hard to learn (in fact they are quite simple - I have taught them to my 8 year old daughter). But its the content rating of the course. Mind you we keep things very clinical (like what you might hear spoken at a doctor's office) - but nonetheless these classes are for mature people. Should children and teenage girls learn this material? Absolutely! - But parent's need to be the ultimate judge on what material their children are taught.

Stay Safe!

January is National Stalking Awareness Month

2009-01-22T21:28:00.003-05:00

January is National Stalking Awareness Month.........I'm ashamed to say that i didn't know this. Its also a huge problem - bigger than what most people realize. Check out these stats from the Department of Justice:

Stalking Victimization in the United States, (1/13/09) found that 3.4 million persons identified themselves as victims of stalking in a 12-month period. This figure, which represents an increase of 2 million victims per year over the findings of a key 1998 study, suggests the urgent need for a more comprehensive response to the crime.

That's a staggering number. My instructor Steve Kardian is interviewed here on how to deal with stalking situations. One of the bigger problems with stalking is that with the advent of the internet has developed a new form of stalking via the internet. Websites like Facebook, LinkedIn, and MySpace only make it easier for people to be cyber stalked as well.

So what can a person do?

Determine what (I call) your "cyber footprint" is: if you google your name and address what comes up? If there is information out there that you don't want people to see - do what you can to have the site remove it or change it on your own. Try to lessen your cyber-print as much as possible.
Dump your home phone and get a cell-phone only. Especially a no contract phone. If this is not feasible get out of the phone book. Get an unlisted number. Or try to get the number listed in your pets' name.
Try to go about your daily routine in condition yellow. Most people operate condition white and are oblivious to other people around them. In condition yellow you are aware of the situation around you and always paying attention. I.e.; Has that car been following you? Have you seen that guy before? Is someone watching you? Trust your instincts.

Privacy Rights Clearing House offers some very salient points:

1. Use a private post office box.. Residential addresses of post office box holders are generally confidential. However, the U.S. Postal Service will release a residential address to any government agency, or to persons serving court papers. The Post Office only requires verification from an attorney that a case is pending. This information is easily counterfeited. Private companies, such as Mail Boxes Etc., are generally stricter and will require that the person making the request have an original copy of a subpoena. Be sure to get a private mailbox that is at least two ZIP codes away from your residence. Use your private post office box address for all of your correspondence. Print it on your checks instead of your residential address. Instead of recording the address as "Box 123," use "Apartment 123." If you must use a traditional home mailbox, make sure it has a lock.2. Do not file a change of address with the U.S. Postal Service. Send personal letters to friends, relatives and businesses giving them the new private mailbox address. Give true residential address only to the most trusted friends. Ask that they do not store this address in rolodexes or address books that could be stolen.

3. Sign up for your state's address confidentiality program . Nearly half the states offer a no-cost mail-forwarding program that enables victims of domestic violence and stalking to protect their residential address. A few states limit the program to just the driver’s license or solely voter records. For a list, visit: www.sos.state.ok.us/acp/confidentiality_programs.htm

4. Obtain an unpublished and unlisted phone number. The phone company lists names and numbers in directory assistance (411) and publishes them in the phone book. Make sure you delete your information from both places. Do not print your phone number on your checks. Give out a work number or use an alternate number such as a voice mail number when asked – that is, a message-only number that is used solely for receiving recorded messages from callers.

5. If your state has Caller ID, order Complete Blocking (called "Per Line" Blocking in other states). This ensures that your phone number is not disclosed when you make calls from your home. (See PRC Fact Sheet 19 on Caller ID, www.privacyrights.org/fs/fs19-cid.htm .)

6. Avoid calling toll-free 800, 866, 888, 877 and 900 number services. Your phone number could be "captured" by a service called Automatic Number Identification. It will also appear on the called party's bill at the end of the month. If you do call toll-free 800 numbers, use a pay phone.

7. Have your name removed from any "reverse directories." The entries in these directories are in numerical order by phone number or by address. These books allow anyone who has just one piece of information, such as a phone number, to find where you live. Reverse directories are published by phone companies and direct marketers. Contact the major directories and request that you be removed from their listings:

Haines Criss+Cross Directory, Attn: Director of Data Processing, 8050 Freedom Ave. N.W. , North Canton, OH 44720.
By phone: Call (800) 843-8452 and ask for extension 312.
Equifax Direct Marketing Solutions (formerly Polk):
By mail: Equifax Direct Marketing Solutions, Attn: List Suppression File, 26955 Northwestern Hwy., South Field, MI 48034.
Include your name, address, ZIP code and phone number.
By phone: (888) 567-8688

8. Let people know that information about you should be held in confidence. Tell your employer, co-workers, friends, family and neighbors of your situation. Alert them to be suspicious of people inquiring about your whereabouts or schedule. If you have a photograph or description of the stalker and vehicle, show a photo or describe the person to your neighbors, co-workers, friends, family and neighbors.

9. Do not use your home address when you subscribe to magazines. In general, don't use your residential address for anything that is mailed or shipped to you.

9a. Do not accept packages at work or home unless they were personally ordered by you.

10. Avoid using your middle initial. Middle initials are often used to differentiate people with common names. For example, someone searching public records or credit report files might find several people with the name Jane Doe. If you have a common name and want to blend in with the crowd, do not add a middle initial. In fact, consider using your first initial and last name only in as many situations as you can.

11. When conducting business with a government agency,only fill in the required pieces of information. Certain government agency records are public. Anyone can access the information you disclose to the agency within that record. Public records such as those held by a county assessor, county recorder, registrar of voters, or state motor vehicles department (DMV) are especially valuable to a stalker, as are business licenses.

Ask the agency if it allows address information to be confidential in certain situations. If possible, use a post office box and do not provide your middle initial, phone number or your Social Security number. If you own property or a car, you may want to consider alternative forms of ownership, such as a trust. This would shield your personal address from the public record. (For more information on government records and privacy, see PRC Fact Sheet 11, www.privacyrights.org/fs/fs11-pub.htm .)

12. Put your post office box on your driver's license. Don't show your license to just anyone. Your license has a lot of valuable information to a stalker.

13. Don't put your name on the list of tenants on the front of your apartment building. Use a variation of your name that only your friends and family would recognize.

14. Be very protective of your Social Security number.. It is the key to much of your personal information. Don't pre-print the SSN on anything such as your checks. Only give it out if required to do so, and ask why the requester needs it. The Social Security Administration may be willing to change your SSN. Contact the SSA for details. (See PRC Fact Sheet 10 on SSNs, www.privacyrights.org/fs/fs10-ssn.htm .)

15. Alert the three credit bureaus--Experian, Equifax and Trans Union. Put a fraud alert on your credit reports to avoid fraudulent access. (See PRC Fact Sheet 17a on identity theft for information on establishing fraud alerts, www.privacyrights.org/fs/fs17a.htm .)

16. If you are having a problem with harassing phone calls,put a beep tone on your line so callers think you are taping your calls. Use an answering machine to screen your calls, and put a "bluff message" on your machine to warn callers of possible taping or monitoring. Be aware of the legal restrictions on taping of conversations.

Stay Safe!

Junk Science, Bogus Cops, and Health Fairs (oh my!)

2009-01-15T15:40:00.005-05:00

The Fight Like A Girl program was at Childrens Hospital on Wednesday for their annual employee Health Fair. We had a nice poster and handed out information on Personal Safety(which is the first 4 rules in Fight Like A Girl). We also got to show off some really neat items such as hi-lumen flashlights and personal alarms. Take a look at our poster.

It was a good time and we got to schmooze with other community resources. Its always nice to get out and meet some very intelligent people - it forces me to keep up the pace as well. One of the questions posed to me was “does the recession have anything to do with the crime rate?”. Drawing back on my criminal justice education; I am racking my brain trying to remember any studies that addressed this.

Nevermind, that it was 6 degrees Fahrenheit outside and the only thing that I could think of was Quetelet’s Theory of Thermic Delinquency. Which postulates that in colder climates people commit property crimes (burglary, theft, B&E, etc.), but in warmer climates people commit person to person crimes (rape, robbery, murder, assault, etc.). This was later debunked by a 1974 study in Baltimore that showed no significant changes in crime trend patterns over a period of 3 years. Oh well, into the history books for bright-eyed criminology students to study (along with phrenology and body somatotypes).

Nonetheless, the question still bears some answering as to whether or not an economic recession/ depression increases crime? According to a security website it does (they list ways to protect against crime). As to whether or not their is a scientific correlation between the two the only thing we really have to draw on is from the Great Depression. Chicago Tribune writer Angela Rozas puts better ink to paper than i can so I'll leave you with her thoughts. Suffice it to say I don't think its ever a good time to let your guard down. Keep to your first rule: Always be aware of your surroundings.

This brings up another rumor I heard at the health Fair about a bogus police officer in a white caprice pulling ladies over and then supposedly raping them. Sherri Bevan Walsh, Summit Couny Prosecutor the rape bogus but the jist of the story is real. The Beacon Journal's website is bogged with rumors so rather than reposting I went to the Plain Dealer to get a better story. Bevan Walsh had this to say:

Bevan Walsh said people should follow these precautions when being pulled over by a police officer in a marked police cruiser:

• Pull over.

• Do not keep driving, as the officer will believe that you are fleeing and will give chase, which is dangerous to everyone.

• Once you have pulled over and if you are uncomfortable, roll the window down only enough to talk to the uniformed officer and ask them for additional identification. Each officer should be in uniform, and carry a badge and a separate identification card.

• If you are still uncomfortable, and you have a cell phone, call 9-1-1 to confirm the officer's presence.

• If you do not have a cell phone, ask the officer to call the radio room and to send a backup cruiser or officer to the scene.

Safety precautions when being pulled over by someone in an unmarked car with flashing lights:

• Be very careful and suspicious!

• Immediately call 9-1-1 to confirm if the stop is legitimate.

• As a general rule, unless you are engaged in illegal drug activities, you will not be pulled over by an unmarked car.

• The only other real police officer who might pull someone over in an unmarked car would be officers on private property such as a school officer, or an officer with the Akron Metropolitan Housing Authority. These officers may not have marked police cars. If you are on these or similar private properties, pull over. These officers should still be in uniform and should carry a badge and identification.

"In the end, I always say to use your instincts,[emphasis added]" she said. "If it doesn't feel right, it probably isn't. Call 9-1-1 to make sure." (source= http://blog.cleveland.com/metro/2009/01/the_summit_county_prosecutor_i.html).

One thing they didn't tell you is that the Ohio Revised Code does not permit unmarked vehicles for traffic enforcement:

4549.13 Marking and equipment for motor vehicle used by traffic enforcement officers.

Any motor vehicle used by a member of the state highway patrol or by any other peace officer, while said officer is on duty for the exclusive or main purpose of enforcing the motor vehicle or traffic laws of this state, provided the offense is punishable as a misdemeanor, shall be marked in some distinctive manner or color and shall be equipped with, but need not necessarily have in operation at all times, at least one flashing, oscillating, or rotating colored light mounted outside on top of the vehicle. The superintendent of the state highway patrol shall specify what constitutes such a distinctive marking or color for the state highway patrol.

Effective Date: 10-25-1979

Stay Safe!

What's it like to Fight Like A Girl?

2009-01-10T14:09:00.008-05:00

Somewhere along the line you found this blog and your probably wondering what's a Fight Like A Girl class like? Its a good question, your probably apprehensive about the course content, whether your getting your money & time worth, or if the instructor is qualified to teach this material. Those are all very pertinent questions.

Let me try to explain first what the course is (you can look at my instructor background to get some idea of my credentials under the profile section) first. The course is designed to teach you how to fight for your life in a worse case scenario - an assailant is trying to rape and kill you. We don't teach how to defend against muggers who just want your immediate cash on hand (though you will pick-up defenses for people who invade your space), we don't teach defense against ID theft (though that's a huge issue in and of itself). We stay focused on how to defend YOU and your body.

The class starts out with some introductory material that helps to inform you. I give this in a lecture format and also use DVDs to explain some basic principles. That's the first half hour of the course. After that we go into the physical aspects of the course. Then we go into the Teaching/ Practice/ Stress Algorithm:

We show you the technique and then teach the finer motor skills of the technique.
Then we have you practice the technique to learn the body mechanics. We really emphasize practice, the body actually develops a functioning record of a technique that is known as "muscle memory" as you practice it more often.
Therefore, in class we ask you to do the technique at least 5 times to become proficient with its understanding.
Then we put the Redman Suit on and add stress to the situation so that you can actually do the techniques against a trained instructor (instructors are professionals that have years of martial arts training and can take a full force kick - the suit helps though).

After a few times of teaching tecnique+ practice+ Redman Suit I had an entire class actually chanting "Redman, Redman, Redman"!!

After the hands on portion and plenty of Q&A we go back to the lecture format and watch a review section of the DVD to further solidify the techniques. And then adjourn for the evening. Participants get a student manual with the course and we also have an evaluation that helps us prepare for future classes. Here's a video of my Instructor Steve Kardian running one of his Fight Like A Girl/ Rape Escape classes (links to YouTube).

Awareness Avoidance Action

2008-12-12T15:39:00.020-05:00

After taking a hiatus to get some other business done. BTW, I'll be teaching the Rape Escape Course for the North Canton City Schools - Continuing Education in 2009. Now I want to get back to addressing some ideas about Self-Protection. Let's go back to the drawing board....When we consider the steps we take to protect ourselves - sometimes it helps to look at things from a paradigm or a descriptive example. What I would like to throw out to you is the paradigm of the Triangle. Take a look at the triangle that I have hastily drawn below...

You see that there are 3 sides to the triangle - each side has a different verb under it. At the base of our protective paradigm is Awareness. We cannot avoid or take action from crime (or even learn how to do so) unless we are aware that it exists and how it can affect us. In some ways this also requires us to be honest with ourselves and do a little bit of "what iffing".

What if a man was following me?

What if a man was in my backseat and I didn't know it?

What if a man approaches me in a parking lot?

What if a someone broke into my house while I was home alone?

This isn't paranoia....its just asking yourself "what would I do in the following situation?". Its actually the basis of learning too. Take a Rape Escape/ Fight Like A Girl course and we address several of these "what if" situations. In fact the course is based on actual research of over 100 sexual assault/ victimization studies compiled from a 7 year period (OK enough of the marketing - Back to the topic).

Avoidance

When you start to think about this you may seem overwhelmed but the truth is that you know when you meet someone that they are not a "good person". They give you the heavie-jeevies but being polite people and raised in a society that teaches women to be demure and passive; you'll find reasons why to distrust your feelings. Gavin de Becker, the author of The Gift of Fear (a most excellent book) gives an example of a woman who had a handyman that her cat did not like. When she asked about this, Gavin stated that it wasn't the cat that sensed the man's "evil" - rather the cat was playing off of the woman's intuition, yet she was doing everything to discredit her own feelings. The moral of your story: Trust your instincts - they are probably correct! The flip side of this is that often we allow nice people to get into our space and to threaten us; Ted Bundy often abducted his victims by appearing as a well dressed young white man who spoke softly and asked women to help him. He wasn't the paradigm of what we think an evil person would be, but he was evil. And he prayed on women's misconceptions and kindness.

Action

Speaking of space, you have probably heard the same old tired advice "Walk with Confidence". Phooey! What if someone approaches you and calls your bluff? Paxton Quigley, author of Not an Easy Target has an interesting take on this that I really like. It gets into the paradigm of what men thinking women should be like (as I say it changes your OODA Loop - but that's a lesson for another time). She calls it her Get the F__k out of here! defense. She says that when someone or some people approach you who mean you no good tell them straight out to: GET THE F__K OUT OF HERE! The reason this works is because men expect women to be passive and when you show that you are anything but that they are taken aback (Also, this attracts attention, which is something that bad guys don't like). If you have trouble doing this - stand in front of your mirror and say this out loud - be sure to point when you do this and say with all the vitreol you can summon up. Now when you are going about your daily routine you know you have a psychological weapon you can utilize. Then you can follow up with your hard challenge and open hand strike that you learned in Rape Escape।

Having this knowledge - you can now really walk with confidence!

Stay Safe!

Cursing the Darkness

2008-12-09T18:26:00.038-05:00

Somewhere in my lifetime I remember hearing a proverb that went to the effect of: "don't curse the darkness, rather light a candle". I'm not sure where this little maxim comes from but it has spurned me to seek pragmatic solutions where there often appears to be none. If we begin to look at our self-defense position the first thing we need to concern ourselves with is Awareness. In Rape Escape that's our first rule: Pay attention to people around you. Criminals tend to exhibit predatory behavior before an attack.

Be aware. The problem comes that at night, especially in these dark months at the end of the year, its not always easy to be aware of what's around you. When your walking to and from your vehicle you should be looking all around, even behind you. It may look strange to the regular passer-by but it lets the thug and rapist know that you are on guard. Your probably saying "I have heard that before - but during the night its hard to see into those dark shadows or between the cars". I agree!

That's why I encourage ladies (and men) to carry a flashlight. Mind you, not just any flashlight. But one that is small enough to fit in your coat pocket or your purse. Also, you want to be familiar with the specification of 80 lumens. The lumen is the basic unit for measuring light output (or perceived output). The beauty of 80 lumens is that at night it is a sufficient light source to blind a person's well adjusted night vision. The original purveyors of this technology have been Surefire, LLC. They are known far and wide in the law enforcement/ military community as having the best tactical flashlights. These types of lights are not cheap they usually start around $60 and can easily go up to $150 depending on make and model. Furthermore, many of them use special batteries that cost more money than AA or AAAs. But for an off the shelf self-defense item - I highly recommend the investment.

Now, don't get me wrong - I am not trying to sell you a Surefire flashlight. I have no interest in the company and do not hold any stock in Surefire. In fact I'll even tell you that I carry a knock-off brand flashlight marketed under the Smith & Wesson logo. The key thing here is to make sure whatever light you get - it has at least 80 lumens output so you know you can light the darkness to check around and in your car, and if need be you can put the beam in someone's eyes to give you time to escape. I've been shined in the eyes when people were goofing around and I can tell you it does disorient you and produces floating lights that leave you somewhat dazed. At a night time training exercise someone shined one of the 120 lumen ones in my eyes and I swear that it felt painful (supposedly the optic nerve does not have pain receptors - but i would beg to differ).

One of the advantages of a tactical flashlight is that the on/off switch is on the tailcap. You hold it in your hand like a roll of quarters and use your thumb to activate the switch. What I like about using this kind of flashlight you usually have it raised to shoulder height since its easier just to bend your arm up. If you have taken any of the Rape Escape courses you'll know that you now have one arm already up to defend against a hit to the face and you can also blind them and/or do your hard challenge escape.

Also, there's a psychological concept at work here too. Your carrying a flashlight at night, that looks like its what a police officer might carry, your checking your surroundings, your holding it like a police officer might. A rapist or mugger might think that you are a police officer or that you have some training or maybe you have a gun. Hey if they think it, and it keeps them from you more power to you. Power perceived, is power achieved.

One word of caution though, Surefire makes a few of their lights with crenelated strike bezels and scalloped strike caps. These are so that a user can turn them into an expedient striking weapon. Unless you train with this and have experience using it - I would caution against it. An untried weapon or technique has no place in a fight for your life - use what you know works.

So I hope this helps shed some light on what you can do to be aware of your surroundings at night and in dark places.

Stay Safe!

21

2008-12-04T20:59:00.009-05:00

The other day I watched the movie 21. A film about a really smart kid who learned to beat the game of Blackjack with a team of other smart people. There were a few things that grabbed my attention when it comes to self-defense. For instance when the security guys wanted to beat the tar out of someone for "cheating the casino" they always took them to a secluded garage. Second rule in Fight Like A Girl! is go to people or stay with people - don't go somewhere secluded - that's the worse thing that can happen. Do whatever you can to stay with people or get official help. That can be anything from faking an illness, screaming fire, or starting a fight with someone else (yes its extreme) - BUT YOU CANNOT GO WITH THE BAD GUYS!

The other thing that leaped out at me was the 2nd plot on the smart kid needing to have a "dazzling life experience" that would wow the scholarship director at Harvard to give our hero a scholarship to Harvard Med School. You wanna know what the most powerful words are in a self-defense scenario when someone is trying to rape or kill you and you are fighting for your life?

Those words are; "I've done this before, I can do it again". Having the life experience of having done realistic self-defense training is what is going to make the difference. Because if you have had the experience, then you have at least practiced it several times, you've done it with the added stress of a realistic attacker, and your muscles have a memory from doing it before. Hence, experience yields knowledge. As Brad Parker so succinctly puts it; "Empowerment comes from knowledge. But panic begins where knowledge ends."

Stay Safe!

The Big Picture

2008-12-02T21:32:00.009-05:00

12/02/08 - OK, my first post on the blog. Rather than diving in to any one of the myriad topics of Personal Safety/ Self-Defense I thought I would try to look at it from a holistic perspective, get the Big Picture without trying to overwhelm everyone at the same time. So where to begin?

Let's look at it like this: we are people. Social creatures that live in a social environment, that has several stressors (economical motivators, fears, expectations, societal standards, laws, mores, norms, basic human needs, etc) . Ultimately, we all want something - to call up from some of my workplace violence lectures "all behavior is motivated". We may want several things. Most of the things we want are legitimate desires (wealth, a happy family life, people to like us, enjoyable experiences, a legacy....... you get the picture). There's nothing wrong with this. Therefore we pursue them; more often than not we look for avenues that are within societal norms (go to school, go to work, make a paycheck, save for wants, spend here and there as desired, etc.). This is typical of probably a good portion of American Society. Now i am sure there are people who live and function legitimately outside of these norms (more power to them!) but for the most part this is the average slice of Americana.

Outside of this slice of the pie there exists a different social caste of society. Often we identify them as criminals, miscreants, sociopaths, etc. Whether or not the label fits and how/why they got the label is beyond the scope of my blog (though I may touch on it occassionally). According to a Washington Post article 1 in 32 adults in the US has been behind bars, on parole, or probation. That equals about 0.03125 or 3% of the population that is classifiably criminal - which seems to jive with my recollection from my Criminal Justice theory classes (blow the dust off). Though I am sure they are only talking about the criminals that got caught. As one Police Science professor put it to me "we only catch the dumb ones". The smart ones avoid prosecution until they run out of luck. That means the percentage could very well be higher. Can we speculate on 5%, 7%, 9%, or even higher ? To this end we have to understand that these people in our society are also motivated to achieve their desires. Whether their desire or the means to fulfilling that desire is abhorrent to Society at large is in many ways......irrelevant to them. It doesn't take a statistical genius (that I am not) to realize that we are living in a society with a significant portion of people who consider us to be "lunch". That's scary.

OK so lets tighten our holistic circle of understanding a bit more. We do things to achieve our personal goals (work, shop, school, leisure). Now a known and a speculated unknown percentage of our Society realizes that our behavior may provide them with an opportunity to aggrandize themselves at our loss. Distilled: criminals prey on other people. More appropriately they prey on perceived weaker people than themselves.

Therefore, as people living in a Society where others may be willing to take advantage of us for their own gain we have to begin to concern ourselves with how not to allow this to happen (another stressor). To steal a cue from my Instructor Steve Kardian there are 3 things we then do (or should do) to not become a target:

Awareness: we start to understand what we have that makes us desirable to a perceived criminal, we learn or theorize on who our "enemy" might be, we study our surroundings to understand what will protect us and what won't, we study the people around us, while some of this is correct - some of what we also believe is incorrect.
Avoidance/ Passive Action: we take precautions that we believe that will make us safe, we change our behaviors, where we go, who we go with, we may take a self-defense course, carry a weapon or self-defense implement, make contingency action plans, devise escape routes and catalog resources (911 - for at home or on the road, Mall Security - for shopping, etc).
Escape (or Fight) / Deliberate Action: Author and psychologist Lt. Dave Grossman lays it down as to what really happens when confronted with a high stress situation - based on his research we will do 1 of 4 things: run, submit, pretend to fight - called posturing, or really fight. All of this is based on our prior experiences, prior training, prior physical and/or mental conditioning, and what we have been able to plan for.

Everything we do and continue to do to make us safer from those who desire to prey on us is considered to be target hardening. Organizations (business, law enforcement, miliary) do this all the time. People do it too - but don't often realize it (locking your doors and avoiding dark alleys are examples). Ultimately, we want to make ourselves hard targets for criminals. In future posts I'm going to get into the nuts and bolts of what we can do to make our lives and our world a safer place. This will be what my blog is about.

Stay Safe!